As it’s April 1st, here is a post containing outright lies. Roughly half of the following statements* are currently true. Others are completely made up. Guess which are which.
I know it’s already the afternoon, and by tradition April Fools should only be done in the morning. Nevertheless, I don’t care.
I have never driven a train.
I have had sex with everyone I’ve ever kissed, apart from relatives.
Recurring blog character Big Dave doesn’t actually exist – if I’ve done something I want to blog about, but don’t want to admit to it myself, I write a disguised version, gender-swap it as required, and attribute it to “him”.
This website is named after a real piece of woodland called “Symbolic Plantation”, a few miles from my house.
I have never worked in any field that I actually have qualifications in.
I was born in the Far East.
Go on, tell me which ones you think are lies.
* And all of the footnotes.