Blog : Posts tagged with 'comedown'

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Handle the falls

In which FP is wandering along the wrong path


Or, in other words, the semi-regular Tuesday “I’m feeling shit” post.

It isn’t a deliberate thing, but it’s a consequence of spending a lot of time away each weekend. Monday or Tuesday become the Big Comedown Day, almost as if I’d been on pills.

If I’m still around friends, then even if I’m suffering from a drop, I can cope. The problem that I have is that by Monday I’m back in the office again, with nothing to help me other than Big Dave asking: “why are you so fucking mardy?” in between singing fragments from 80s TV show themes. I’m left wondering if I really am following the right path, or if I’m just not the right sort of person for all this stuff I’ve been doing. People keep reassuring me that there’s a different path for everybody; everybody can find their own; and when I’m happy right now I’m the happiest I’ve been for a long time. When the drop comes, though, I still wonder if I’m doing the right thing.

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Sunday night and Monday morning

In which the weekend always comes to a close


Weekends away are always good, but the worst part is always the ending. You get back in your car and set off up the M1, and suddenly the loneliness of your life kicks back in again. You wish you didn’t have to leave on your own; you wish you could postpone leaving longer and longer. Driving back up the motorway leaves me wondering if I’ll ever have anybody to come home to, and the feeling’s still there when I get up the next morning.

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